Thousands of divorces take place in Orange County, CA each year. In fact, people are filing for divorce on a daily basis. Some of these couples are taking the “do it yourself” approach to divorce, while others have already hired attorneys to represent them. Others know that they are ready to move forward with their divorce, but aren’t sure what route is right for them. If you are reading this post and wondering if divorce mediation is a good path to take, consider the following:
1. People with assets can choose divorce mediation:
There is a common misconception that divorce mediation will not work when there are assets involved. People feel like there is too much to lose and that they can get taken advantage of in divorce mediation. That is not always the case. Divorce mediation can be even more ideal for couples with assets than for couples who don’t have many assets because there is simply more at stake. The more the couple spends time in court arguing, the more they are eating away at their net worth. If they choose divorce mediation, they can preserve everything they have built by saving tens of thousands (or even hundreds of thousands) on attorney’s fees. To ensure fairness in the divorce mediation process, the couple is welcomed to have independent attorneys review the agreement before it is signed. In addition, the couple can also have attorneys in the background of divorce mediation who can advise them before and after each divorce mediation appointment.
2. People with children can choose divorce mediation:
If you grew up in a household with divorced parents, you know how hard it can be. Personally, growing up in this scenario was not ideal because my parents’ divorce was a long, drawn out court battle that harmed everyone in our family. Even if you are angry with your spouse, it is important to consider what kind of impact the divorce is going to have on your children. Remember, they deserve to have a good childhood and it is up to you as parents to do your best to provide that. When you choose divorce mediation, you can sit down with your divorce mediator and your spouse to build an effective parenting plan. This parenting plan will consider your individual work schedules, your child’s school schedule, and even take into account extra curricular and other activities your child participates in. The goal during these divorce mediation appointments is to keep your child’s best interests at the forefront of the conversation. Divorce is not about hurting one another or “winning”. It is a problem that takes a team to solve and if you and your spouse can work as a team for the benefit of your children, it will only help them in the long run.
3. People who have already hired attorneys can choose divorce mediation:
Many people think that if they have already hired divorce attorneys and filed paperwork it is too late to try divorce mediation. This is absolutely not true. In fact, we have many clients who tried litigating their cases before coming to the divorce mediation process. After growing tired of spending countless hours and endless money on fighting it out in court, the clients realized that they are willing to sit down at the table and settle their differences. If you don’t feel comfortable moving forward with divorce mediation without your attorney involved, you can keep him or her in the background to consult with before and after your divorce mediation appointments. In addition, your attorney can review your Agreement as a draft before you sign it. Even if it is hard to sit in the same room with your spouse, it is better than continuing an all out court battle that will eat away at your finances and patience.
4. “Do it yourself” people can choose divorce mediation:
With the advent of the internet, people have all kinds of options for filing a divorce online. This may be ideal for some couples, but for others it may be beneficial to sit down with a divorce mediator who can assist them. There are a couple of reasons for this. First, there may be blind spots that the couple is not aware of. For example, maybe they didn’t think about the impact of joint tax debt or credit card debt on their agreement. It is also possible that they don’t know how to go about figuring out what would be fair for financial support. Second, even though the spouses feel like they are currently in agreement, it is possible that as they move through the virtual divorce process some disagreements will arise. Instead of allowing these disagreements to turn into conflicts, it is better to address them with a trained divorce mediator.